10-30-07 Dogs on Trucks mailbag
Dear Dogs on Trucks Jr. Sama,
Hello. I hope you are genki and well. I have excellent news to report: The settlement is expecting!
Sumiko and Yumiko are due on 07-19-2032, and all signs shown so far indicate that they will become perfectly healthy Ninja calligraphers, just like their parents.
Healers have warned me of the risk of premature birth due to the extremely curious and adventurous nature they are likely to have as a result of their genetics. The healers have also warned me to keep quiet about their predicted birthday, since it might give them extra cause to rebel against the confines of the womb, which, according to my already outspoken daughters, is “standin’ in the way of the Great Whore getting’ the ass kickin’ she so richly deserves”.
Aren’t they cute already, Dogs on Trucks Jr. Sama?
In accordance with the advice I have received from healers I have given up seafood, naughty goat meat, Nicotiana tabacum, alcohol, corn, and all my encampment deeds in foreign territories, since they provided me with the temptation to access polluted, high-risk lands.
I must confess, however, that before I learned that I was pregnant, I consumed a bit of Mojo Farms naughty goat meat. Although I am praying that this will not have a negative outcome on the girls’ birth, sometimes I have upsetting dreams about my young ones being born too soon, and too feisty, leading me to seek your sage advice.
Can you think of anything else our family might do to ensure that these daughters will grow up to be good girls who will do our Nation proud from the moment they enter our realm?
Thanks very much for your time and consideration. Hope you and your family enjoy a wonderful harvest season.
Sincerely,
Azusa Shouseki
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10-28-07 Dogs on Trucks mailbag
Dear Dogs on Trucks jr. sama,
Hello it is I! Your relation. I am writing to give you happy news: Our family is expecting!
We are going to be moving to a brand-new home in the Ayuwa’si area of Virginia just to make room for our wonderful bundle of joy, whom we can’t wait for you to meet.
If the baby is a boy we will name it after you. If it is a girl, though, what do you think we should name the child, and how many of your resources may we promise it?
Sincerely,
Eats With Teeth Like Knives in CA
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Dear Teeth Like Knives san,
Thanks for writing! You are welcome to visit us here, and you are welcome to name your little pup after me, but please do not attempt to settle on lands here, or steal things out of the air from our farm. Ayuwa'si was not created to support a family like yours.
Also, be sure you never trespass near the fabled fountains of ikigai in Ayuwa’si, lest you anger the springs. Disobey this rule and you will be excommunicated from Tengoku-Mura lands without hesitation.
Here is my response to your questions:
Aya’sta, and
zero, unless your water quality care habits don’t change in the very near future.
With warm wishes for a pleasant Thanksgiving 2.0,
Dogs on Trucks Jr.
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letters to Dogs on Trucks jr.
dear Dogs on Trucks jr.
is it true that you owe the Shouseki Flocks money?
just curious to know whether or not we should squash that rumor.
- Gerta in Alberta
- --...-- -dear Gerta,
yes, please squash that rumor ASAP! I owe the Shouseki Flocks clean water, which is why I am not going to build my kingdom at the (term not given) site.
if the Shouseki Flocks want my money, just tell them to ask for some at the library my Grandfather built. My Grandfather built this institution to help ensure that I, unlike he, would never be faced with unpleasant choices regarding the disposal of (term not given) currency.
if the Shouseki Flocks want something useful, though, like food security or viewshed wealth, please tell them to come help on the farm while we discuss the matter.
thanks very much for writing! hope to hear from you again soon.
- Dogs on Trucks jr.
o O o O o O o O o O o O o O o O o o O o O o
I said in mine heart concerning the estate of the sons of men, that God might manifest them, and that they might see that they themselves are beasts.
For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they all have one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence over a beast: for all
is vanity.
All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.
- Ecclesiastes Ch. 3 verses 18-20
Labels: scripture